Monday, November 12, 2012


Over the span of my life I have lost my desire to be famous. Candidly I will admit that as a child being a celebrity was a huge driving force. I didn't want to be admired for my beauty and have people fawn over me.  In my heart I had a deep seated desire to entertain and  be well liked by everyone. Perhaps this desire arose from low self esteem or a lack of confidence. Perhaps I feared rejection so fiercely that I wanted to know that anyone I encountered had no choice but to revere me. To that end the desire to be a celebrity was a weakness masking itself as strength that would help me feel comfortable in a room full of people.

Thankfully due to some childhood trauma followed by years of extensive teasing and ridicule from my peers I lost all hope in the overt kindness of the human race.  What followed was a short (5 year) reclusive stint of developing and exacerbating a messianic complex.  I eventually flew too high into the narcissistic sky and melted my Icarusian wings. What this experience lead me to realize was that even the truest form of celebrity would only ever be a lie. There is a never a time when a mass of people will legitimately adore you for the virtues that you possess as an individual. Vanity, jealousy, ego and envy are the only words found at the noblest roots of celebrity. Because of this, short of earning money, fame is an empty pursuit.

Andy Warhol famously imagined that in the future everyone would get their 15 minutes of fame. The statement assumed that the hierarchy of what we deem fame worthy would diminish to the point where it was possible for anyone to become famous for anything. He of course was correct in this assumption but he failed to predict a couple hidden effects.

As the divide between commoner and celebrity began to erode so too did the pedestal that we put celebrities on. In recent years we have encountered an increase in flash in the pan reality TV stars and Youtube one hit wonders. However, we have also experienced a strange phenomenon whereby a growing number of people have cultivated what should be 15 minutes into a mini series or movie of the week. I'm not even talking about anomalies like the Kardashians rather I am referring to those that make consecutive appearances as cast members on different reality shows over a period of years. (Addiction show > rehab show > sober living show > rebuilding career show > hedonistic party show to celebrate modest success > addiction show.)

The reason they can do this is because the spotlight had been dimmed and diffused over a larger area of people. Instead of personalities rolling in like huge waves, cresting and crashing on the shore modern day celebrities are scarcely more than a pool of stagnant water. There is no crash and burn or exit strategy because they leave no impression either way.  Like a well placed fart in a poorly ventilated room they simply hover in place and refuse to dissipate. Anyone who encounters a nouveau celebrity is more inclined to turn away in is disgust than to ask for an autograph and a photo.

Low level celebrity is much like the drug game portrayed in rap videos. Neither of these lifestyles actually provide a level of respect/recognition or even a steady income above minimum wage.  The perpetual delusion is that merely being watched doing anything grants you a level of merit above the rest of humanity. Now the world is filled with people who are trying to be seen by other people who are only trying to be seen themselves. The modern pursuit of "fame" is really just an act of fitting in and fitting in is the antithesis of what being famous is.

The Celebracy movement then in its least potent form serves as the promise ring of celebrity. It is an affirmation of integrity and vow not to engage in pre marital fame whoring before you have a real talent to advertise. To this end, the act of withholding  your desire to grab onto any available audience might help restore celebrity to the empty soulless pursuit that it once was. Celebracy in its most potent form is to completely abstain from anything that might make you famous and to view anything you do that is fame worthy as a source of shame. 

Modesty, subtlety, patience and quality these are some of the words found at the root of Celebracy. Any recognition you get should only come from a family member, a close friend or someone's life whom you have touched  personally and profoundly. The intent of the Celebrat (we'll have to work on the title) is to celebrate real people and the effect that they have had on your real life.


  1. Beautifully put. The people directly around us are much more important than detached celebrity husks famous only for attending parties.

    Although, would a family photo constitute as a photo shoot?

    1. "Although, would a family photo constitute as a photo shoot?"


  2. I think I've been practicing celebracy without knowing it. Maybe I need a support group?

    1. We can start a group called "The Fanatics of Mutual Respect."

      P.S. I appreciate your unprompted adherence to the calling of celebracy.

  3. Great post Drone! Reminds me of when my ex-wife and her mom really wanted to get our 2 year old son into modeling. Their main argument was that, "He could end up becoming famous". I was dead set against it and wouldn't allow it (I guess I was practicing celebracy back then and didn't know it).

  4. I don't hate the famous. I don't love them either. They just are.

  5. i think i am famous... it is just that nobody else knows.