Showing posts with label truth. Show all posts
Showing posts with label truth. Show all posts

Wednesday, October 19, 2011

Sometimes A Dream Is Just A Dream





The other night a show was on television in the background. I assume that it was Dancing with the Stars but I cannot be sure. During this particular segment there was a girl on who was a krump expert, I think that they are called crumpets. This crumpet weaved a familiar reality television tale about how dancing was her dream and the only thing that she knew how to do. At some point her mother was interviewed and it was revealed that she used the money allotted for the electricity bill in order to pay for her daughters dance classes.




As an observer we are supposed to take from this admission that her mother so deeply believed in her daughters talent and drive that her passion needed to be fostered over the families collective ability to see at night. For them, it worked out. The Krumper somehow managed a dancing career and she earned a feature spot on Dancing with the Stars. The message was clear: "Dream big, hold onto your dreams and never let go." It is the type of message and sentimentality that America can get behind. If you apply yourself, try really hard and want it bad enough, good things will happen. I don't want to diminish this message because being passionate and hard working is a great thing. However, I do feel that the other side of the coin must also be shown.




Every X-factor, American Idol, America's Got Talent show has the same premise. A hardworking, unrecognized nobody from somewhere in the middle of the country possesses a huge unrecognized talent. These people are burdened with children, bills, drugs, early childhood trauma. Their only way out of their horrific nightmare is for America to witness their inner awesome and catapult their fledgling career to the next level. For each cycle of the show about 4 out of 50,000 realize that dream. The rest of the people (the failures) are served with even more self doubt and tragic life circumstances.




All of their lives they were told that if they put their eggs in one basket and prayed to the god of money and success that their dreams would come true. The real reality is that most of our dreams do not come true. Further, investing your entire life into something without objectively assessing your own level of skill is reckless and irresponsible.


How about a reality show called "American Idol The Failures." The show would be shot documentary style like the little vignettes that are spliced into every program. we would visit the mobile home of Johnny failure in Mobile Alabama. Now thirty pounds heavier and rocking a strike beard he tearfully laments through sips of Budweiser how his wife and kids left him when HE left to pursue his American Idol dream. He quit his job at the cattle ranch/quarry/steel mill to pursue his passion and lost his medical insurance along the way. In a freak tractor accident he ran over his own foot, pulverizing it. Unfortunately due to having no insurance the wound festered. Johnny eventually had to get his friend Marcus to do some "doctoring" which involved pouring moonshine on his bloated leg and hacking it off with a chainsaw.




If the desire to be famous was promoted like a gambling addiction rather than a test of strength and willpower how many of us would still be obsessed with it? If fame was a sickness that needed to be cured how many of us would circumvent modest opportunity time and time again. Fame is a fickle lottery. Even talented people are passed over because they don't have the right "look". No one gets their 15 minutes of fame anymore and very few get 15 seconds. For every success story there is 100 suicides and 1000 broken homes. Dreams are great things to have just remember that many of them turn into nightmares that you cannot wake up from.



Thursday, April 7, 2011

Honesty Is Never The Best Policy



Fat, dumb, ugly, annoying. One or more of these words applies to you, does it feel good knowing that? Though we've never met are you glad that I was honest with you or would you rather that I just kept that to myself?


No one wants to hear the actual truth. What's the first thing you do when someone says something about us we don't like? We try to convince them that are wrong. If you thought that I hurt your feelings and think I'm an asshole, you would not be wrong in that feeling. No amount of me logically explaining my behavior is going to make you think "Yeah, I guess he's not an asshole."




The only reason people will claim to admire honesty or to be "brutally honest" is because they want to excuse themselves from the horrible things they are about to say to you. In a perfect world we could all be narcissists surrounded by a bunch of androids, built to pay us flattering comments and accept verbal abuse. Unfortunately, the world is not perfect and people don't want to hear the truth especially in the vile, offensive way in which you present it.




Even on occasions when I say I want the absolute truth, I still want a softer version. I want to hear: "Yeah, unfortunately we're going to have to lay you off due to cutbacks." I don't want to hear "We're firing you because you are a lazy inept piece of shit worker who brings down the productivity of the company whenever you are here." Both of these statements achieve the same result, but one is less hurtful. Even if my wife was having a sordid affair I'd rather her say "Yeah, me and my friend Thomas were just exchanging massages, that's why we had our clothes off."


From what I know about society everyone recycles, no one watches television and no one eats fast food. Yet streets and garbage cans are littered with bottles, American Idol consistently gets 30 million viewers and there is a fast food chain of every name in every town. The reason we claim to recycle without fail is there is nothing but a negative connotation carried with not recycling. If people say that watching television is bad for you, then you project the image that you don't watch it. Fast food is unhealthy and you don't want to be seen as unhealthy or fat, so you deny it. Let it be known that your individuals reflections on each of these things mentioned do not concern me. These are merely rhetorical to drive home the bigger point. The bigger point is that people are dishonest when the doing or not doing of something carries a stigma.




If we are honest with ourselves we like a little dishonesty spliced in with our honesty.